Getting ready for work this morning...did my usual: blow-dried my hair, fluffed it, went to hairspray my coiffure in place. When I touched my hair, I couldn't feel any hairspray in it, so I sprayed some more. Same result! Odd, yes?
Much to my chagrin I realized I was spraying deodorant in my hair...DOH!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
Nothin' but respect to the 70+ crowd...but this was FUNNY.
I was at the bank drive-through yesterday evening and saw the funniest awkward thing, and it wasn't anything to do with me!! To set the scene for you, there are 2 drive-thru lanes at my bank - where you would use those plastic tube containers that are sucked up and into the bank. I was in the right drive-thru lane and there was a driver on my left. I'm sitting there waiting for the teller to process my deposit through the tube system when this old lady confusedly wanders up to the teller window on foot.
Old lady: Hello? Excuse me? (knocks on bank teller's glass)
Teller (confused, speaks through the speaker at my drive-thru lane): Can I help you?
Old lady (looking around for the source of the teller's voice): How do I use this thing?
Teller (still through my speaker): Are you trying to make a deposit?
Old lady: Yes.
Teller: Oh, ma'am you would use one of those tubes. (Points to the driver on my left who is completing his transaction and putting the empty tube back into the unit)
Old lady: Oh! Thank you. (Walks over to the tube the teller pointed at, struggles to get the tube out)
Driver on my left: (Not sure how to react, still sitting in his drive-thru lane, watching as the lady tries to pull the tube out of the unit a foot away from him)
Teller: Ma'am? Ma'am? You actually have to drive through, if you could just go get your car and come into one of these lanes I can talk you through the whole process.
Old lady: Oh! Okay. And you'll show me how to use this thing? (Points to tube) I can put my money inside of that?
Teller: Yes ma'am you can.
Old lady: Okay I will be right back, in my car.
Teller (confused, speaks through the speaker at my drive-thru lane): Can I help you?
Old lady (looking around for the source of the teller's voice): How do I use this thing?
Teller (still through my speaker): Are you trying to make a deposit?
Old lady: Yes.
Teller: Oh, ma'am you would use one of those tubes. (Points to the driver on my left who is completing his transaction and putting the empty tube back into the unit)
Old lady: Oh! Thank you. (Walks over to the tube the teller pointed at, struggles to get the tube out)
Driver on my left: (Not sure how to react, still sitting in his drive-thru lane, watching as the lady tries to pull the tube out of the unit a foot away from him)
Teller: Ma'am? Ma'am? You actually have to drive through, if you could just go get your car and come into one of these lanes I can talk you through the whole process.
Old lady: Oh! Okay. And you'll show me how to use this thing? (Points to tube) I can put my money inside of that?
Teller: Yes ma'am you can.
Old lady: Okay I will be right back, in my car.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Please chop down the jungle...
So all summer, I have been watching the jungle grow onto my patio with part annoyance and part fascination...but I decided I just couldn't take it anymore. It needs to get the ax! Here's the email I sent my apartment complex this morning along with some accompanying pics. Oh, I was thinking of offering to do the landscaping myself if they cut my rent by a hundred bucks a month. Whatcha think??
Good morning,
I spoke to someone in your office a week ago about the state of my patio, and I just wanted to make sure that this would be addressed since the landscaping company is in the complex today. Attached are some photos I took of what it looks like on my patio right now. There are also a couple pictures which show the vines growing over the top of the AC vent & the kitchen window all the way up to the 2nd floor. I know that the back side of my building doesn't face the parking lot but it should still look presentable & professional and I should be able to have the use of my patio.
If possible please have the landscaping company remove the offending bush by the roots (the one whose vines are 6 feet up the wall). It grows about a foot a week, which means that 4 feet of vines would be on my patio every month until the next time the landscaping company comes out.
Please, please chop down the jungle...
Thanks so much,
Kristin Cline
I would appreciate a call or email back letting me know that this issue has been taken care of.
Good morning,
I spoke to someone in your office a week ago about the state of my patio, and I just wanted to make sure that this would be addressed since the landscaping company is in the complex today. Attached are some photos I took of what it looks like on my patio right now. There are also a couple pictures which show the vines growing over the top of the AC vent & the kitchen window all the way up to the 2nd floor. I know that the back side of my building doesn't face the parking lot but it should still look presentable & professional and I should be able to have the use of my patio.
If possible please have the landscaping company remove the offending bush by the roots (the one whose vines are 6 feet up the wall). It grows about a foot a week, which means that 4 feet of vines would be on my patio every month until the next time the landscaping company comes out.
Please, please chop down the jungle...
Thanks so much,
Kristin Cline
I would appreciate a call or email back letting me know that this issue has been taken care of.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Me too!
So I'm at church last night, and people are standing up to share their thoughts on this series we just finished on The Purpose Driven Life, and a girl stands up to speak and ends up getting a little tongue-tied mid-sentence. (Public speaking...yesssssssssssssssssss). She covers up well, announcing to all that she is a little awkward sometimes. At her proclamation, my heart races...I'm beaming...I sit up straight...and before I can stop myself, a loud, gutteral croak emits from my throat - "Muh-muh-me TOO!"
Awkward Turtles, unite!!
Friday, July 11, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Tales of Toilet Paper...Part 2
I just do not understand what it is with me and toilet paper tragedies. How many embarrassing debacles must I endure before the humiliation is complete? I am doomed, DOOMED, to the toilet paper hall of shame. Where did all this begin???....I think it all started at my mom & stepdad's wedding, when I used about a mile and a half of toilet paper after using the potty at the wedding reception and promptly flooded the ENTIRE restroom, then fled in a panic, launched my 8-year old body into the crowd of happy wedding-goers & loudly announced what I had done.
Fast forward a few years to high school, when the hall pass for my science class was a toilet seat. Yes, an ACTUAL seat that was SAT UPON by a plethora of BUTTS large and small...albeit, sufficiently sterilized (one would hope) - especially since I hung it around my neck to make it less awkward to carry.
Fast forward another few years - after using the restroom at a co-worker's house for her daughter's baby shower, I wrapped my *ahem* sanitary product into a few squares of toilet paper and stuffed it into the garbage can. Not 15 minutes later, my coworker's old grey dog limped into the living room where we are all gathered, watching the happy mom-to-be unwrap gifts, and there was something in the dog's mouth that was trailing out and behind her. As I watched in horror, she PLOPPED the thing at the feet of the preggers woman like some sort of prize. You guessed it. I'll spare the details.
Fast forward to the present - Chris and I, visiting his aunt, uncle & 4 cousins in Damascus last night for dinner. I went to wash up before dinner, and YEP - USED THE REST OF THE ROLL. Not wanting a repeat of last weekend's incident, I bravely marched out of the bathroom & directly up to the dinner table where all were seated and made my proclamation. Maybe this will break the toilet paper curse....I won't stop hoping - at least, until next time.
Fast forward a few years to high school, when the hall pass for my science class was a toilet seat. Yes, an ACTUAL seat that was SAT UPON by a plethora of BUTTS large and small...albeit, sufficiently sterilized (one would hope) - especially since I hung it around my neck to make it less awkward to carry.
Fast forward another few years - after using the restroom at a co-worker's house for her daughter's baby shower, I wrapped my *ahem* sanitary product into a few squares of toilet paper and stuffed it into the garbage can. Not 15 minutes later, my coworker's old grey dog limped into the living room where we are all gathered, watching the happy mom-to-be unwrap gifts, and there was something in the dog's mouth that was trailing out and behind her. As I watched in horror, she PLOPPED the thing at the feet of the preggers woman like some sort of prize. You guessed it. I'll spare the details.
Fast forward to the present - Chris and I, visiting his aunt, uncle & 4 cousins in Damascus last night for dinner. I went to wash up before dinner, and YEP - USED THE REST OF THE ROLL. Not wanting a repeat of last weekend's incident, I bravely marched out of the bathroom & directly up to the dinner table where all were seated and made my proclamation. Maybe this will break the toilet paper curse....I won't stop hoping - at least, until next time.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Monday, July 7, 2008
Tales of Toilet Paper
So Chris and I were visiting friends of his, Andy & Amber at their home in Pennsylvania. This was my first time meeting them; Andy is a childhood friend of Chris' whom he doesn't get to see often. Oh, they have 2 really cute kids. I mention the kids because one of them is directly involved in this most awkward of moments. So to set the scene, we're all sitting around in the living room just chatting, and their little girl, age 5, goes off to use the restroom. Below is what happened after she left the living room...
5 year old, calling from bathroom down the hall: "Mommmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyy! Helloooooo! I need toilettt pappperrrrrrrrrrr!"
Andy: What? Did she say she needs toilet paper? Is there none in there?
Amber: Well, there was.
Me (over-loud): OH!!! Actually that's my fault. When I used the restroom...I used the rest of the roll. But it seemed pretty awkward to just come out of the bathroom and announce that.
Chris (laughs): So instead you just said nothing, and now you get to announce it anyway.
Me: Yeah, instead I wait until someone else is stuck in the bathroom without toilet paper. Oh boy.
Amber & Andy: (pity laughter)
Chris: You should put this on your blog!
Andy: What? Did she say she needs toilet paper? Is there none in there?
Amber: Well, there was.
Me (over-loud): OH!!! Actually that's my fault. When I used the restroom...I used the rest of the roll. But it seemed pretty awkward to just come out of the bathroom and announce that.
Chris (laughs): So instead you just said nothing, and now you get to announce it anyway.
Me: Yeah, instead I wait until someone else is stuck in the bathroom without toilet paper. Oh boy.
Amber & Andy: (pity laughter)
Chris: You should put this on your blog!
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
We've said it so many times...it doesn't make sense anymore!
Random convo with my sis online...
Janis: apparently!
Janis: a-PAR-ently (I think that's what you were asking) um. ap-PEAR-antly (prununciation-wise) that's what I stress. Am i making any sense??
me: haha, i stress the LEE part. like, just then.
Janis: I stress the PAR part
me: not always. like if i am saying, "apparently she didn't want to eat poop", i would say it the normal way.
Janis: ap-PEAR-antly
me: but just then accentuating a point, would be apparent-LEE!
Janis: me too, well for the first bit. a normal statement, I would stress everything equally
me: me too
Janis: for sarcasm, I say "ap-PEAR-antly"
me: yeah!
Janis: doing it your way sounds weird. no offense, I can't do it right even when I try
me: oh, wait is that what i meant to say? oh, ok here is what it sounds like: a-PEAR-ent-LEE!
Janis: no, still doesn't sound right. I tried it out loud. Maybe I need to hear you say it
me: haha are people around you looking at you oddly now?
Janis: yes but only a little, they're used to it
me: haha. no reaction on my end. no surprise
Janis: ahahah!
Janis: apparently!
me: now, do you say that, "apparently" or "apparent-LEE?"
Janis: a-PAR-ently (I think that's what you were asking) um. ap-PEAR-antly (prununciation-wise) that's what I stress. Am i making any sense??
me: haha, i stress the LEE part. like, just then.
Janis: I stress the PAR part
me: not always. like if i am saying, "apparently she didn't want to eat poop", i would say it the normal way.
Janis: ap-PEAR-antly
me: but just then accentuating a point, would be apparent-LEE!
Janis: me too, well for the first bit. a normal statement, I would stress everything equally
me: me too
Janis: for sarcasm, I say "ap-PEAR-antly"
me: yeah!
Janis: doing it your way sounds weird. no offense, I can't do it right even when I try
me: oh, wait is that what i meant to say? oh, ok here is what it sounds like: a-PEAR-ent-LEE!
had to say it out loud to make it sound right.
Janis: no, still doesn't sound right. I tried it out loud. Maybe I need to hear you say it
me: haha are people around you looking at you oddly now?
Janis: yes but only a little, they're used to it
me: haha. no reaction on my end. no surprise
Janis: ahahah!
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