Refill DOH!

Baskin Robbins on Christina's birthday. I needed a refill for a cup of water...

Me, to BR employee: Could I have a refill please?

BR employee: Sure. (takes cup)

Me (making awkward small talk): Yeah, I drank all my water up.

BR employee: Yeah, uh, I do understand the concept of a refill.

Me: Oh!! I'm sorry, I wasn't implying that you didn't.

Tastes like...what?

(Joanne Kim's house, Monday evening. Some people sitting around in the living room. Cue Joanne, walking into the living room with a bowl of blueberries)

Joanne: Here's a bowl of blueberries! Minus the cool whip.

Me: Yum, blueberries! (grabs handful & pop into mouth)
Mmmmmm, blueberries have this yummy aftertaste of, like, butterscotch.

(Very long pause)

Chris: That. Is. The. Craziest thing I have ever heard.

Holy meal

...with a slice of Heaven for dessert.

Don't take the pic yet!

Wait, I wanna take off my glasses first!
Oh, wait, you took the pic anyway.
Awwwkward......

Cut the Line

Try this next time you're at Chipotle....

Old, grumpy man: Where is the express line?

Woman: Right here.

[Old, grumpy man attempts to cut the line.]

Woman: I don't know if you can see it, but the back of the line is all the way over there!

Old, grumpy man: But I'm a Christian!

--Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
www.overheardinnewyork.com

Overheard in New York

Greatest new discovery...entry from www.overheardinnewyork.com:

10-year-old little brother: And then there was this huge fight on an armored train.

20-something big brother: Wait, are you sure it was a train?

10-year-old little brother: Yeah, it was an armored train that had guns, and bombs, and fireworks.

20-something big brother: Are you sure it wasn't a truck? I saw that movie and it was a truck.

10-year-old little brother: Nope, it was a train.

20-something big brother: You didn't see the movie, did you? You just had someone tell you about it, right?

10-year-old little brother: Yeah...

Yes, please! I mean....what?!

Flower Delivery Oops...

Cell phone rings on my desk at work....

Me: Hello?

Florist: Hello Ms. Cline, this is Teleflora calling about the flower delivery you placed.

Me: Yes?

Florist: Well we wanted to let you know that the delivery was, uhhm, rejected. The funeral home had no record of that person being, uhh... deceased.

Me: Oh. Well, uhhh, I had the delivery sent to the living recipient of the flowers. Cause, you know, I didn't want to send flowers to someone who had, uhh, passed away, since they wouldn't be able to actually receive them.

Florist: We can have the flowers re-delivered...what's the deceased person's name?

Me: Um, yeah....I'm not really sure. Can you just have the flowers re-delivered, and just, you know, tell the funeral home to give them to the living person and not the deceased?

Florist: Uh, yeah, sure, we'll do that.

...If that wasn't the most awkward phone call...lol

Brian Regan - Awkward UPS

Engrish Awkward

Uhhh...what?

Pedicures in Black & White

So I had a girls night last night so we could all get pedicures for our friend’s wedding on Saturday. We were talking about what our dresses look like and all of theirs were purple, blue, light blue… and i was like, “uh-oh”, to myself. Now, this wedding is at 2 PM and my dress is more appropriate for an evening ceremony. I spent a fortune on this &%^$#@ dress, so I could wear it to every formal event in 2008.

One of the girls asked me what color dress I’m wearing. I’m like, “Uhhhhhh, black & white.”

The bride, quick to reassure, said “Oh, that’s ok!! Black & white is fine as long as it isn’t mostly black with only a little white trim!”

So, yea, perfect description of said dress.

Awwwwwwk-ward!